Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize