I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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