We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize