yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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