I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Oh god it's open bar.
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