Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
