I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
