How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
