I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
