I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
