Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
