just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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