Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
