All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
