I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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