Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
