the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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