Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
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