remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize