are you still at the devil's house?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
