And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
