And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Randomize