Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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