So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
