FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
