the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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