Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize