Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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