Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
