oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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