Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
