I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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