White coat. Heels.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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