The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
