i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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