is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize