you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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