um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
