the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
