I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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