we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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