we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
