the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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