thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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