I cockslap morals
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
