So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
