Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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