I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
