O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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