Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
