Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
